Madonna is joining our club. The Material Girl turns 50 in August and it looks like she’ll be celebrating by going on a world tour. Some women climb mountains or run rapids to mark the day. Others pull on their bustier and black boots and say “look at me now.” At least she’s not home whimpering under the covers.

In fact, Madonna is taking the whole 50 thing head-on, insisting she will never conform to people’s expectations of a half century woman.
“Once you reach a certain age you’re not allowed to be adventurous, you’re not allowed to be sexual,” she complained to a reporter.
“I mean, is there a rule? Are you supposed to just die?”

We who have survived the crossing can assure her that there are plenty of fine 50 and over examples to counter those dead and dreary expectations. The limits are lifted and if there’s any rule at all it’s to refuse to be invisible which would not seem to be an issue for Madonna.

No matter how famous and talented you are.. turning 50 can be a rocky passage.

It is pretty telling, however, that even this pop icon is not exempt from the worry and dread that the calendar is going to force her into someone she’s not.

You have to admire her for not just slithering over the line and hoping no one noticed since she could have passed for 40-ish for many more years. But she might as well be pro-active since the media would have certainly outed her. That’s one drawback to being a celebrity. You don’t get to lie about your age, because it will surely show up in a People column.

But, sure, even the Material Girl, gets to be a little un-nerved by the whole thing. No matter how famous and talented you are, no matter how much your kids adore you and men swoon over you and teenage girls want to dress like you, turning 50 can be a rocky passage.

She started out sounding a little defensive but seems to have developed the appropriate attitude. Now when asked how she feels about this special crossing her response is,
“F*** you, I’m 50.”

In a show of solidarity, a Portland, Oregon woman defended Madonna in the New York Times after a critic said the Material Girl’s famed sex appeal would surely, inevitably fade.

In a letter to the Times, and a good example of talking back to the media, the Oregon woman faulted such limited thinking and pointed out, “There is no universal law that women’s sexuality or beauty fades over time. It does not fade, it deepens.”
Meanwhile Tina Turner, at 68, is on her first tour in eight years, proving she still has the voice. And the necessary equipment, including her itty-bitty skirt and outrageous high heels. “You can’t go without the lipsticks, the hair and of course making sure you bring the legs along,” said Tina.
She also said her friend Sophia Loren insisted that it was time for Tina to get back on the road.
So, what does this mean to those who don’t have the stuff and talent of a Madonna or a Tina and don’t have the counsel of Sophia? It’s just another reminder that when you think it’s over at 50 or 60 or any age that makes you shudder, it helps to have another woman pop the black balloons and push you back on stage.

Madonna picture courtesy of The Telegraph

I wore a green T-shirt last week that says “KENNEDY –80” as in 1980… in yellow letters. It’s the oldest thing in my wardrobe. I’ve held on to the shirt through many moves and dresser drawer purges. I guess I knew I’d want to wear it again some day.
The morning when Ted Kennedy was having brain surgery I dug it out and wore it. All day. For good luck. In solidarity, even though shamrock green is not my best color and the letters are kind of lumpy and cracked. But it drew a few knowing nods and smiles. I didn’t have to explain the words or the occasion.

Ted Kennedy was in his 40s when he went up against Jimmy Carter for the Democratic nomination for the 1980 presidential election. I was in my 30s. I think that I was actually a Carter supporter but back then I was fascinated by everything Kennedy. I still am.

I picked up the T-shirt in 1979 on a trip back east when I was visiting my New England family. My relatives all have those strong Massachusetts accents, although theirs are more Car Talk than Harvard. And about half of them are Republicans, but they, too, have always gobbled up every bit of news about the Kennedys.

Sometimes I refer to him as Teddy, like he’s a big brother. Politically he is.

My brother-in-law worked for Boston newspapers and said the Kennedys were always good news even when it was bad news. Especially when it was bad.

Ted Kennedy has brain cancer. What a shock. I began reading everything I could about it and him, including the many tributes about his political legacy, although some of it seems premature, like they’re practicing writing his obituary.

Sometimes I refer to him as Teddy, like he’s a big brother. Politically he is. He’s been around as long I’ve paid attention to what’s going on in government. And I’ve always liked his politics. He’s been talking about national health care for a long time. And he cares about other things that you want Democrats to care about, like schools and the environment and women.
The role of elder statesman became him, as did that of Kennedy patriarch.

The guy is hardly Mr. Clean. People will never forget the scandal of Chappaquiddick and they shouldn’t because a young woman, Mary Jo Kopechne, died. The details of that tragedy are still murky and Ted Kennedy carries that stain. But he’s always done fine work and taken care of his family.

When I heard he’d had a seizure I assumed it was a stroke. When the doctors quickly said that wasn’t it, I naively, optimistically, wanting things to stay as they are… thought, “Oh good. No stroke.”
Then they said he had a malignant brain tumor. What a stab in the back. The man has done so much for cancer research and his own kids and ex wife have survived cancer. Isn’t that enough cancer for one family?

I realize that I am taking this personally. His time has been my time. Is the Kennedy era, as he lived it and as I lived it, now coming to a close?

There are good people ready to take over, but I want Teddy Kennedy around a little longer. When he went sailing after his diagnosis I thought, “He can’t be that sick or they wouldn’t let him out in the ocean.”
Now he’s made it through open cranial surgery. I’m keeping that T-shirt close by.
For Teddy and me.

Listen to the audio version of “Teddy’s Time” on the podcast page under Another Voice.